I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
