I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
