Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize
