i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
