Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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