Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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