what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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