you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
