so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
