But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
