dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
