Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
