it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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