Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
