Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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