Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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