win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize