If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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