I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Randomize
