Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
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