why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
We are two peas in an std pod
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
