How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
