Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
