just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize