We're like a lot better than the average bears
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
