Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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