I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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