you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
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