he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
