problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
