Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Randomize
