and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
