you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize
