I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
His nipple licking is glorious
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