oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
