oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize