i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
