There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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