covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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