Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
