She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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