1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
