I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
