did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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