so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
