too bad you live with your parents still
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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