She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
