I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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