I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I forgot how hot balto sounded
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
