if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
